Pimpmobile

A vehicle used by the late Pope John Paul II during his Scottish visit in 1982 has been sold for 37,000 pounds.

The converted British Leyland vehicle, which has just 11,000 miles on the clock, was sold at auction in Dumfries.

Auction house Thomson Roddick said no details of the buyer were immediately available. Auctioneer Sybelle Thomson said the level of interest in the sale had been overwhelming.

She said there had been inquiries from all around the world. Some observers believe that the vehicle has been secured by Vatican theologians, as Leyland vehicles from this period are strong examples of Unintelligible Design - the theory that a vehicle like an Austin Princess contains such a complex collection of awful styling, materials and execution that it simply couldn't be the work of mere man and indicates the work of a higher power.

They suspect that the vehicle is already being stripped by a crack team of Opus Dave in the Vatican lock-up, searching for confirmation of the tenets of Unintelligible Design - that Jesus' descendants settled in the Midlands.

A spokesperson was unavailable to comment on the question of why a pious man of unshakable faith in a God of love and compassion requires 25 tons of armour plate and bulletproof glass on his runabout.