Divven ya knar wor Harry is that ginger one's bairn?

Anthony McPartlin and Declan Donnelly - also known by enthusiasts of the council arts as 'Ant & Dec', are to follow in the footsteps of Jonathan Dimbleby and interview the Prince of Wales for ITV - only this time he will be accompanied by his sons William and Harry.

Sweet child o' mine, we'll not get an opportunity like this ever again comrades. Imagine, five of the biggest oxygen-thieves on the planet, in the same room. It's too good to be true. An audacious plan is already being planned for one selfless cultural warrior to sacrifice themselves in a glorious martyr mission. The corrupt decadent regime will tremble when our glorious soldier starts to spread our message of talent and ability. Useless cunts from all social backgrounds will be hunted down to create a new meritocratic paradise.

We'll smuggle the operative in as a translator.