Deep down idiot

US President George W Bush has insisted that honourable policy and justice are alive and well in America. "Sometimes we don't see it that way on the surface, but I'm tellin' ya, deep down they're alive." Mr Bush, speaking on a visit to San Antonio, Texas, said that "whilst fair-play could easily get trapped underground in a poisonous atmosphere of liberal hand wringing" eventually it would be rescued by a combination of conservative Republican values and business thinking. "We're going to rescue truth and justice"

Truth and justice were last heard from on Wednesday evening, when the seam of lies, half-truths and obfuscation propping-up the current policies collapsed. Nothing has been heard from them recently and they are not expected to survive. An expert from a West Virginia mining firm commented "When you sink this deep it's hard to say how you get out easily."